An Artist’s Expression?

I’ve pondered, lately, a series of posts considering art (paintings, sculptures) in another exploratory attempt of something I’m not a fan of.  This isn’t that, though, so I’ll save my reasons and explanations.  Things have been a little dark in the world of Mark Mushakian, lately, and last week I started thinking about how I could express that.  I consider myself an artist: through writing, performing, etc..  However, when I hear artist, the first thing I imagine is a painter – yet I don’t do that.  Why not?  I’m not that good.

It can be very inhibiting to curtail one’s artistic expression due to lack of skill.  I love music, but I am still a beginner in terms of playing the piano or guitar or even composition.  Painting isn’t something I’ve thought about in the past, but it’s again something that I couldn’t just be free with – I’d have to practice to reach a level where I could then be satisfied with what I made.  What I’ve been thinking about, though, is what if I can express myself anyways?  Paintings are generally intended to express feeling – but I can’t enjoy it unless it looks real, hence my dislike of abstract art.  I can DO abstract art, though.  Retarded elephants on fire can do abstract art.  Yeah, yeah, I know – they’re about composition and colors, but let’s save that for my other series.

I find nothing visually appealing about abstract art, but the point here is – can I find a voice in EXPRESSING myself with abstract art?  I don’t know.  My greatest artistic expression is acting, and it always will be, but that isn’t something I can always do at the drop of a hat.  If I were to paint, I could slam red onto the canvas if I’m in a bad mood, or pick faintly with dark colors if I’m feeling solemn.  I just had a flashback of finger painting – and that’s just about what I’d be doing, only with a brush.  I wonder if I can satisfy myself in that way… I certainly don’t remember finding much satisfaction with finger painting, but I’m a little different now than when I was 4

So, for those of you who have dabbled in painting, yourselves, what do you think?  Any advice?