...in more ways than one .

First, I am finally employed, again.  It's very part-time, and is a seasonal position (now until January), but I'm very, very happy to have it.  As to the where?  Well, if anyone wants a 25% off discount from Michael's.. you let me know .

Second, I'm done with other projects.  I had another website I was working on for a guy who was going to pay me to do it (very beneficial before I'd found a job), so that took priority.  Then I had to work on a slideshow for my oldest friend's wedding coming up, so I'm JUST now returning to my site redesign.  That's why it's been so quiet here... I'm really trying to focus any extra energy on that, so I can have it done as soon as possible.  So, what am I doing here?  Just wanted to say, "Hi" .

Landing this job, and with other things going on in life right now, has made me very happy - in a way I haven't been for quite a long time.  I'll talk more about all of this later (as I said, I'm trying to hold back on posts until launching the new site, so I'll probably have a big recap of the last month when I do), but things are looking up in really great ways (for me AND friends) - and it's darn exciting .

Oh, and if you're wondering what that top image is?  That's the current state of my new re-design.  So, no... don't hold your breath for it to be finished for a little while longer .

Inception
Time/place: 4:20 showing at Westminster 10 with Nick, Mike, Brian, and Justin

I'm keeping this one for me.  I may talk about it down the line, as I did with The Dark Knight, but I don't know that I will.  As I did with my minimalist review for Adam, there is something special and personal with this certain movie-watching experience that I want to hold for myself, so I only have 3 things to say:

Your mind IS the scene of the crime... and that has more meaning than you think.

Whatever you take out of this movie is what you brought into it.

Christopher Nolan knows how to make me smile.

Grade: A+ (and I can't mean that enough)

...still working on the redesign

...still occasionally struggling with the redesign

...still looking for a job

...still having a hard time focusing on the site without one

...still playing Red Dead Redemption

HOWEVER, in other news:

...now really working away on a Western screenplay I've been toying with for over a year

...now feeling that creative flow again, and hoping to concentrate on writing as best I can without a job

...now very interested in the recently announced DLC for Red Dead

And, as you've come to expect:

...always Mark Mushakian of markmushakian.com

Since I started this site o'mine, we've gone through a number of changes.  At first I wrote my blogs out manually, each on their own hand-coded HTML pages, with a forum for leaving comments.  Then I employed a commenting system to replace the forum.  I followed that with a switch to full-fledged blogging software, but the changes kept coming.  I've designed and redesigned my menus, altered how I address site news, tried new features that didn't last, and on and on.  Every change has been in the interest of improvement, though.  Change isn't always for the better, and sometimes these new ideas fell through, but I'm always interested in finding the best ways to do things around here.  Which brings us to today...

Due to some technical things I won't go into here (more for the sake of brevity than any type of secrecy), I'm looking to make a new change.  A BIG new change.  What kind of change?  Well, for starters, these "technical things" I'm referring to involve me switching to an entirely different blog system.  Fret not... posts won't be lost, all of your witty comments from the past will be transferred, but it's going to be alot of work for me.  While I'm at it, though, I'm going to make a fresh start.  This site has been running on (basically) its original design, but with the new things that I'll be able to now easily implement with my new blog software (the lovely Wordpress 3.0, for those curious), I'm interested in starting from the ground up.

I know what I'M after, in terms of what I'll be designing for (more social integration, Flickr and YouTube galleries, "prettier" design, more fun imagery, etc.), as well as new features that I'll be able to bring about better due to the new design (a podcast, regular media updates other than through my blog, having comments on Facebook copy over to this site, etc.), but since I'm not the only one who visits this site, I'd like to cast the questions your way.

ANY idea is appreciated (besides retracting my opinions on movies, Certain Someone), so I'd love to hear your thoughts!  I'm really interested in bringing more function and visual appeal to this place, but that doesn't mean that I haven't put alot of hard work into what it is right now... so go easy on harassing me for my current design.  Let's look to the future without mocking the past, shall we?

If it's ideas for layout, comments based on your screen resolution, color combinations that hurt your eyes (yes, I definitely take into account the common complaint of the white text/black background - that's a high priority, actually), interest in a certain type of content, or whatever - let me know in the comments!  Take a look at this site's current layout, see what information I'm trying to share (and realize that there is more coming), and let me know what you actually do or don't care about.  Get as detailed and picky as you like.. I can't consider changes if I don't hear about them .

P.S. - I may be disappearing for awhile as I work and test out my new system/design (along with hopefully working, playing Red Dead Redemption, and living life), so don't expect many more entries here until the new launch.  There is quite a bit of work to be done, and a plethora of new possibilities, so it'll take some time.

Toy Story 3
Time/place: 11:40 showing at Ocean Ranch 7

Fifteen years ago I went to see the first Toy Story movie with my family.  I was 12.  Today I saw the finale, and I tell ya, folks... Pixar couldn't have created a more fitting conclusion.

I enjoyed the first movie.  It was entertaining, but as I grew up and matured, so did Pixar.  The sequel continued to deal with the same issues of the first, and I was a cool teenager when that one came out, but still... "When Somebody Loved Me" got me weepy.  The inclusion of such a beautiful, sad, and haunting song was very reminiscent of one of the best "kids" movies made, one I was fortunate enough to grow up with - The Brave Little Toaster.  Basically, Pixar was improving their ability to portray the difficulties and triumphs of life in a way that was entertaining, funny, and heartbreaking all at once - just like life, itself.  With Toy Story 3, they have culminated all of their talent to covering one of my most cherished topics... growing up.

What really makes Pixar movies so amazing is that they don't speak down to kids.  They are a movie house that deals with reality, and the fact that life can be hard sometimes.  Their previous movie, Up, portrayed this in the first 10 minutes... with barely a dry eye in the house.  I'd heard that Toy Story 3 was reducing even the manliest men to blubbery messes, and it was no different in my theater.  During the last moments of the movie, I couldn't help it, myself.  You know that quivering breath you get when you're really crying?  Yep, that was me.  I shook my head, as tears were rolling down my face, at the fact that freaking Toy Story 3 had done this to me.  It wasn't just the ending, though.  The movie opens up by defining the themes in play immediately.

Oh, and a quick break to talk about the short they play before the feature.  It's stylistically fantastic, but, for as clever as it was, my interest kind of waned until it really explains itself near the end... then it became amazing .

I'd like to just talk about the movie, itself, but I really can't.  It's part of a trilogy.  As I said in the beginning, this is the perfect cap to the journey, and one that adds so much more to the previous movies.  That, in my opinion, is what makes a sequel (of any number) great - when it makes the movie before it even stronger.  I'll talk about details below, but beyond the nostalgia and emotion of the "growing up" theme, I thought the movie was great in other ways.  First, the freaking baby - one of my favorite animated characters ever .  It was really tragic and horrifying - but completely mesmerizing.  Haha, and, speaking of Baby... the Star Wars allusions continue in this movie, but I'll let you discover them on your own .  There is a scene in the movie that I really, really want to talk about, but I'll have to save it for the spoiler section below.. and if you've seen it, I think you'll know what I'm referring to.  All of this talk of emotional depth and sadness, though, doesn't make it seem like a very entertaining movie, but it is.  Pixar knows, very well, the greatest key to emotional movie-making: follow the sadness with a laugh.  Even through a tear-stained face, a laugh is the perfect release.  They brilliantly ended the tear-inducing ending with some fun scenes during the credits, but besides that - the movie was just plain hilarious.

There were character cameos throughout the entire movie, spanning the whole Toy Story series, and unlike some finale movies.. it always felt right.  The most immediate one that pops into my head had the entire theater laughing, including myself.  As garish as Ken might've come across to me in the ads, he really did provide some entertaining moments - much to my delight.  Another thing that really threw me off, when I first heard about this movie, was the inclusion of the character Slinky Dog.  His voice for the first two movies was the late Jim Varney, and I was a little disappointed to see him being replaced.  I realized, though, midway through the movie, that Slinky Dog was barely talking - and I could tell that it was on purpose, almost out of a respect to his original voice... I thought it was really endearing.  There were so many reasons to love this movie, though... a sweet little love story that blossomed, characters became buddies who never were before, the daycare telephone was a great character, and much more.

I'm sure you don't need my recommendation to see Toy Story 3.  If you're on the fence, though, let me give you this encouragement.  While the trailers don't show it, Pixar has brought to this story their ever increasing level of mature storytelling, so much so that this one is almost more for the 20-something year olds who grew up with the series than the little kids.  It's great fun for all ages, but the running themes will no doubt hit alot of folks rather hard.  Whether it's parents dealing with their children growing up, or young adults growing up themselves, there are a great many things to take away from this movie.  I came home wanting to give some of my old stuffed animals a hug - just in case .  So, to you, Pixar for a beautiful series ending that I wasn't expecting, and a wonderful tale about growing up - "Thanks, guys."

Grade: A+

I haven't done much in the past few weeks/month/longer.  And, when I say "haven't done much" I mean that most of my time has been spent lounging around being unproductive in every way.  You might LIKE to think that it's due to my previous post and a certain video game, but it's not really.  There are extenuating factors, such as the seasonal allergies that have zonked me out and helped throw off my sleep schedule, however that really isn't the crux of it.  I've been without a job since January, and since then I've slowly been watching my funds dissipate.  I'm fully intent on pursuing acting (and I am... just shot for an ad agency Tuesday night), but I can't really devote money to it because I don't really have much to spare... so I have to wait.  I have some web projects I'm interested in... but I have to wait.  EVEN more than the waiting, though (this post feels like a matryoshka doll, geeze), it's that I have no responsibility.

Like a kid on summer vacation might become increasingly lazy, there really isn't anything I have to do - so I fell into a horrible (and very disliked, by myself) habit of sleeping in and staying up late, like summer vacation.  I've lounged around for days without shower or shave because I didn't have anywhere to go, like summer vacation.  The problem is that I'm not on a break from anything... I WANT something to do.  The worst part, is that I just can't muster up energy when I have nothing to do... it's a complete motivation killer.  My most creative times have always been while I'm in a job or school for this very reason.  I really need that structure and purpose, or else my days are listless, as they have been these past few weeks/month/longer.

Tuesday I had a job interview and went to do the commercial shoot.  Wednesday I had another interview.  I'm at a point where I'm just waiting on this ONE little detail, and then I can be free to do so many things!  Haha, it's really exciting, though... because as soon as it happens, like a bolt of lightning all of this energy is just going to shoot and I'll be at auditions in LA (gas money is keeping me local right now), doing this and that.  I was talking with a friend the other day, and I commented how so much of my life is waiting on two things.  For the long-term, it's meeting the right gal, but for this short-term, it's just finding a decent job.  I've talked about the many things I've held off on spending money on, but few may realize that I actually have a prioritized list.. well, at least part of it is.  Let's look at it, together!  It'll be fun!!  (Just humor me... I'm unemployed and listless, remember?)

1. Droid.  OMG, I know.. Mark's buying a cellular phone device??  Thaaaaaaat's right.  I've actually hit a point in life where it'll have some purpose, something I was never quite sure would happen.  I'm rather looking forward to it, though.

2. Wii.  Not for me, but for the family.  Still working on that relationship, as best I can.  Playing 4-person tennis in our living room should be a good step forward .  Boxing may not.

3. Dinner for Nick.  Lobsters and steak with diamonds and gold, my champion... it's the least I can do.

4. MarkMushakian.net.  Intent on taking over the Internet?  No... but very interested in having a one-stop place to send people I'm interested in auditioning for?  Yes.

5. Other acting stuff.  Paid casting sites, printed headshots, etc..

6. Savings.  When my car died in December, I had to borrow a hefty amount of change to fix it, so I'm going to be paying that off as quickly as I can... socking a pretty good amount away each month towards it.

And as far as numbered listing goes, that's it.  Really, though, the best part of having a semi-decent income again will be the freedom.  I have no idea when I'll land a job (though I'm really pulling for one of the places I interviewed at this week), so I'm not free to just buy things on a whim.  Yeah, I bought Red Dead Redemption, but there are some things worth the sacrifice - even when pinching pennies .

What else is on my list?  Do you care?  Haha, I probably wouldn't, either, but ya know what... I'm here, so why not?

• A small bag from Saddleback Leather Company.  I carry a pen and camera in my pockets, now, but adding a cell phone will just be too much to carry before I start looking like M.C. Hammer, so I'm looking for something to carry my camera, a sketchpad, and some other miscellaneous things.
• A pair of Vibram Five Fingers shoes for my morning walks.
• Eyeglasses.  I'm getting old.
• Sunglasses, while we're at it.  For this and the prior, I'll be perusing Allyn Scura.
• Movies!  My goodness, movies.  I have barely purchased any new movies, nor have I been spending money at the theater, so I can't wait to start up again.
• Clothes.  As I talked about in my final style entry, it'll be wonderful.  Or, should I say, FAAAAbulous!
• Netflix.  Cheap, large catalogue, cheap.  I'm sold.
• Rock Band tracks.  Especially with the forthcoming Rock Band 3 and it's new guitars/piano, I'm looking forward to Queen, Oasis, and a plethora of other tracks I'm intending to buy.
• Calling cards.  Just my name on a card, so as to keep it multi-purposed... add on ".net" with a pen for passing out at auditions, email, phone numbers - whatever.
  

It may not seem like much, but perusing this list makes me happy.  It's a list of things yet to come, things that I'm really looking forward to but have yet to obtain.  Unlike the promise and excitement of a wife and kids (a recent evening babysitting really painted a beautiful image for me of an ideal future, too), these things are much more immediate and plausible.  Not that I can't have a family of my own, of course, but this is a simple list of items that only require money - of which I will hopefully have some soon .

So, how about you folks?  I know cash is tight all around, for various reasons, so do any of you have similar lists?  Even if it's not a list of goods, do you have your eye on any kind of specific prize that helps keep you a little motivated... even when you're not?

Red Dead Redemption
Platform: PS3

Well, here we are.  After nearly a month of playing every day (quite often, ALL day), today I finally concluded the story of Red Dead Redemption - possibly my favorite game of all time.  That's right... it has been said.  Unlike any other story-driven game I've played before, even open-world ones, even though the game is "over" I still can't wait to finish writing this and go back and keep playing (well, it's a little late, now.. maybe tomorrow).  Sure, there are still some little details left to complete, but more than anything, my continued interest in returning to this world after others would consider it done, ironically, is actually because of the story itself.  But I'll get to that later .

Now, after the first week of playing, I wrote a post exalting it and the numerable game-play impressions it had amazed me with, so I'll try not to rehash that here (and trust me, ask me about it sometime and I'll talk for days... that's why I'm trying to show some restraint now).  Many folks refer to Red Dead Redemption as "Grand Theft Auto with horses", but it's really not.  Okay, so it kind of is, but it's very much a game unto itself, as well.  GTA IV and Redemption certainly share the same style-pedigree, but there's a little something different in this Western - the world, itself.

Obviously, the fact that this is set in a much different era than modern times is a major point, but even within that scope, the world is alive in ways that GTA just isn't supposed to be.  This truly is the wild west, with huge open expanses teeming with life.  Walking down a city street, the only real danger my character faced was crossing a road against the light, however in south-western North America in 1911, the dangers increase ten-fold.  Let's just say that in the dead of night, in the middle of nowhere, is the last place you want your horse to die - and when it happens, it's kind of terrifying.  As time went on, the once-frightening threat of cougars became slightly watered down as I became rather adept at killing them, though they were then replaced by the fear of bears.  This isn't a horror game, though.  A huge part of what makes this world so charming is the gushing love I talked about in my first post about it... it's just beautiful.  Just about every guy I know has at least some interest in the Western genre, and this game actually lets you play in it.  There have been games on this subject before, but Redemption is on a completely different plane, just in terms of scope and depth.  The amount of things one can do are really extremely impressive.  When I first started the game and saw mountains in the far distance, I became giddy realizing that I could then get on a horse and RIDE to those mountains.  As I said, though, I'm trying to refrain from rambling on about it TOO much .

But what about the story?  I'm getting there.  First, though, I do have to list a couple of complaints.  ZOMG, WHAT??  I know.  For as great and popular as Red Dead Redemption is, it has become almost as famous for its many glitches.  There were a couple of times when I was witness to an invisible horse in a cut-scene or something randomly hanging in the air where a person was once holding it.  I've even seen men riding horses half-sunk into the ground.  Any game has weird little hiccups like this, but sometimes they took me out of the moment.  Near the end of the game, I was rescuing someone, and on the ride back their dialogue wasn't audible.  I was able to find out what he was saying through the saved conversation in the menu, but it was a bit of performance that I missed all because of a glitch.  Also, there are some specific animals that I am sent to hunt, that I was planning on saving until a little later (a wolf and a bear), but missions during the game brought me into contact with them so that I had to kill them during the mission or end up dying.  These little things weren't HUGE, but they were enough to mention.  The only reason they really even stuck out was because I love this game so much.  I loved escaping into the epic old west, and these errors momentarily took me out.  Except for the fact that there aren't trains in the multiplayer world... that's just annoying.

Speaking of multiplayer, I think how Red Dead Redemption implements it is awesome.  Taking the game online places you in the same open world of the single-player game - only with up to 15 other players running around, too.  There are regular matches, too, like any shooter, but having an online free roam mode in a Western is even more fun than in a city.  I have repeatedly (and only half-jokingly) said that if I had a great amount of money, I would buy all of my friends this game - and a PS3, if necessary.  Taking to the hills in a stagecoach with a friend is more fun than I can tell you... especially if you then accidentally take that stagecoach off a narrow train bridge you're trying to drive across and die.  But, all of this is just in the name of fun.  I've certainly played fun games before, so why did I proclaim this as contender for my favorite game I've ever played?  The story is the answer to that question.

As per our usual spoiler-free agreement, I'll get into dirty details down below, but from the very first moments of the game, I was absolutely hooked.  This game has no cool opening music sequence (as it's predecessor, Red Dead Revolver, and most GTA games do).  No, instead the single-player story has an opening title sequence to start the game.  It opens on a beautiful shot of a ferry on a river, with a haunting piano tune filling the score.  I almost got misty right then and there.  Then a crane carries a car off of the ferry and onto land, and the piano continues.  This story is very much about the end of the wild west.  For everything I said above about the dangerous and unruly environment, the story itself is about the containment of that wilderness.  Like GTA IV before it, it's also about punishment, forgiveness, family, grace - and redemption.  Yeah, I'm talking about a video game.  As I told Nick's mom tonight at dinner (hi, everybody), video games have come a long way.  As the story goes along, we get to know our main character, John Marston, fairly well.  Slowly his tale is revealed, and like a good, classic Rockstar character, he is someone who is trying to right a wrong.  This time, though, it's HIS wrong.  He's a former outlaw who is being forced to hunt down former cohorts.  During his quest we come across sneaky peddlers, alcoholics, greedy revolutionaries, lonely spinsters, and a whole cast of other characters, all with their own sad stories to tell.  While the fun and adventure are definitely present, this game shows us a dying West - a solemn place filled with death, disappointment, and regrets.  While I talked about wanting the lead character in GTA IV to end up living a happy, redeemed life, I wanted it even more for Marston - his motives weren't revenge, but something else entirely.

This game is amazingly cinematic.  Characters talk about life.  They develop relationships with each other - good and bad.  When one of these characters gets killed, it's sad.  There is attachment, both to the individuals, to the main character, and to the world itself - all of which are dying in one way or the other.  Rockstar drives home this cinematic feel by including a couple of songs in the actual gameplay.  The first time it happened, as I rode my horse into Mexico for the first time and a song started and continued for the next few minutes as I took in the new landscape... well, it was one of greatest moments I've ever had playing a game .  As I've seen a few people online say, it just doesn't feel right calling this a game - and it's for reasons like that.  While GTA IV surprised me by its having tragic storyline, Red Dead Redemption surprised me even more.  For those who may play it, remember that it's not over until the credits roll, and when they did... I cried.  Like I might at the end of a beautiful and touching movie, I am not at all ashamed to admit that I cried.  First a song played, and it was a great one, but what really hit me in the waterworks was when the haunting piano tune from the opening of the game repeated itself here at the end.  And yet, because of how the game ended, I have a new lease on being able to continue on exploring this world.  Sorry I can't tell you why here, as it would destroy the experience and surprise for someone else, but I absolutely loved it.  People have complained about the ending, saying that it ruined the game for them (not completely, I'm sure, but enough to complain).  I disagree, though.  There were a great number of people who complained about how The Sopranos ended, but as a fan of the series I realized that it was the perfect ending.  Red Dead Redemption goes out the same way.  It never betrays itself, and it creates a compelling story that kept me interested the entire time - even if it was sad.

Red Dead Redemption has taken days' worth of my time, and I'm sure it will take days' more.  I suppose I didn't do a very good job of keeping things succinct, but I really couldn't help it.  This game, on every level, blew my mind on a regular basis.  In terms of gameplay, aesthetics, character, the score (my GOODNESS, the score), environment, technical power, and especially story... I absolutely loved this game.  When GTA IV ended, I asked where Rockstar would go next.  I couldn't be happier with where they ended up .

Grade: A+

P.S. Bonnie MacFarlane, I love you.

I was driving home this afternoon when I looked at my scruffy face in the mirror and it reminded me of something.  I took a picture:

Remind you of anything?  Let's try some cheap awesome Photoshop trickery to really sell it:

There we go.  They say couples grow to look like each other over time... I suppose it's true .

"The world is black and white... you add the gray."

I tell that to people all of the time, but am often rebutted on it.  It's very simple, though.  Sometimes the gray is an excuse or sometimes its valid reasoning.  Irregardless, in a world of fact and truth, the gray is the element of humanity and emotion.  I may be a realist, but folks seem to often equate that as something that dismisses emotion.  They are not mutually exclusive.  Facts are facts, and that's what I look at first.. but that does NOT mean that emotional responses aren't natural.  In that realm of gray, though, there are two ways to look at things - positively or negatively.

CERTAIN people I know (hi... almost everyone) tend to focus on the negative.  I am constantly encouraging them to look at the reality of the situation to help calm their over-emotionally poor reaction to situations and events, however that is just as quickly followed up by a plead to find the positive.  I'm not saying to go around like a cheery dope ignoring that there are bad things in this world and that sadness happens (which is why an eye for realism is the first step), because unless you're a former pot-head and/or your IQ can be counted on two hands, that type of mentality will crack.  It's not genuine.  As an example, last Sunday I had a heck of a lovely day, but it could have just as easily been seen as a lousy one.  Cheers to Sarah and the fun we had - a farewell to The Omelette Parlor which closed on Monday, a walk around the swap meet, my quest for an Icee which led to a Frostee, and everything in-between.  Each one of those things, however, (plus more) could be looked at in a negative light... but why bother?

I was going to do a clever little entry where I'd list the fact of what happened (woke up at 4:30AM by a skunk smell and didn't go back to sleep) followed by a negative (stupid skunks, now I'm running on just a few hours of sleep all day) and positive (dude, I saw one of my favorite guys I know as an actor in an Extenze commercial that I wouldn't have seen if I wasn't up at butt-crack AM) outlooks... but the whole thing was just not coming together well, so I've scrapped it.  Take a gander at that one example though, and you'll what I mean.  Things aren't always great, and they can be downright horrible sometimes, but that doesn't mean you have to focus on it.  Try your darndest to look at the good things in life, and you'll find your life alot more livable.  You could be the richest and most miserable person in Manhattan, New York, or a happy little kid playing with a rock in Ziggawoozy, Africa... it doesn't matter what you have, but how you enjoy what you do.  A little too greeting-card for ya?  Well, I love you anyway .  STILL too sappy?  Fine... here's Marisa Miller:

I wasn't going to write this.  I kind of checked out for about a week, but today I cleaned up and started moving around again.  I was actually planning on posting something tomorrow (Saturday, though I'm technically typing this at 2am, so it's today) that I should've posted Monday, but I'll get to that at a later date (sorry, Sarah).  I'm okay, so as I said, I wasn't planning on something like this to crop up, but as I perused craigslist jobs tonight, something DID crop up... and I want to finally write about it.

I'm sure it's fairly well known for anyone here of my admiration for Mr. Rogers.  I grew up loving his show, I STILL love his show, and he was a gentle and well-loved guy - but it was the subject of his passion that really gets to me.  Kids.  I love kids.  I mean, I love a great many things, and I'm a fan of people... but I have a special thing with kids.  I don't talk down to them, I don't ignore them... I give kids what they need.  So, from time to time I'll see job postings that involve working with kids in some way, and one would think that'd be the perfect part-time position for me as I pursue acting... except, I don't apply for them.  Why not?  Well, some of you know the story.  There are two things that have nearly brought me to tears just by talking about them with friends.  The first, is Katie, and the second is the story of why I have a hard time apply for jobs with kids.  For those who know it, sorry for the rehash, but it came up tonight and it hurt a little more than usual so I needed to talk about it...

What have you heard about what the Bible says will happen at the end of the world?  Irregardless of whether you're a Christian or not, I'm sure that you have, in some manner, heard about what the Book of Revelation says about the future "end times".  You may have heard of a singular world government, microchips, Armaggeddon (NOT starring Bruce Willis), an anti-Christ, people vanishing and leaving the world in chaotic tribulation, and much more.  What if most everything you'd heard was wrong?

Head asplode!

About a year ago, I was at a party and the subject of Revelation came up.  There was some tongue-in-cheek mockery of common beliefs, and being a Christian, I was happy to converse on the subject - at least, what little I could definitively say about it... which wasn't much at all.

I was raised in a church (and family) that believed that there would be a literal anti-Christ who would rise to power through government, that there would be a literal "mark of the beast", that there would be 7 years of tribulation and in the in middle of that Christians would vanish in a rapture... leaving only non-believers left on Earth to go through plagues and horrible things.  I grew up being told these things, by teachers, pastors, and my parents, yet once I started questioning things, most of these ideas never seemed to hold up.  We'll take the simple idea of a "mark of the beast".  The way I was raised to believe explains that this is an actual, physical mark on the hand or forehead.  Originally it may have been believed to be a tattooed barcode, but now the common belief (and one held by my parents) is that it will be a microchip.  What confused me is the logic of that.  The Bible says that nobody will be able to buy or sell without this mark, so the microchip is akin to an ID and credit card information.  This is what I had been taught, yet I thought "...but, we have ID and credit cards now - what does putting it in a chip under the skin truly signify beyond convenience?"  Likewise, the idea of a rapture taking Christians and leaving non-believers didn't make sense to me, because if billions of people disappeared from Earth in an instant... wouldn't just about every other person left (non-Christians) kind of get the point that maybe these Christians knew something?

So, back to the party.  I talked about how, as Christians, we are encouraged to use the minds God gave us, and to never be lazy, so I admitted that I'd had my doubts about most of these generally accepted ideas... but that I'd not yet really looked into it.  The next day I put an end to that.

(I'm doing this without an extended entry, because some folks are lazy and won't keep reading, otherwise)

As I began researching the ideas of how to define the Book of Revelation, I came across a small, but consistent, minority that offered ideas completely different from what I'd always heard - yet in line with what the Bible actually says.  My mind was blown.  The basic gist is that the book is not to be taken "literally".  Why the quotes?  Revelation is the most raped and violated book in the Bible, because it isn't generally taken as it is.  There are some extremists who may say that there is a literal dragon that will come out of the water and that there will be monsters with lots of horns and heads, but most modern Christians pick and choose which symbols they'd like to interpret as literal.  My parents would scoff at the idea of a literal dragon coming up from the water, yet would fear for my soul if I mentioned there not being a literal mark of the beast.  The Bible speaks in a very specific type of language.  Throughout it's text, things are mentioned in a symbolic way: lamb of God, salt of the Earth, the light, etc..  Yet, in spite of the fact that the Bible is so very clear about what Revelation is, so many people miss it.  So, what is it about, than?

After reading and studying off and on for almost a year, I have concluded the truth of the Book of Revelation is the ultimate culmination and "until we meet again" farewell from God.  It is a book that talks about the difficulties of a Christian life in an un-Christian world.  It warns of false teaching and encourages us Christians to stay strong.  How many times have you heard someone mention the book in the Bible, which apparently is all about doom, instead be described as a book of hope and encouragement?!  My friends, if you are a Christian and have always avoided Revelation because it's "weird" or "confusing", I really hope that you'll take it upon yourself to study and look into it.  I do believe that Revelation talks about a literal Judgement Day, in which all of humanity stands before God to face their eternal fate, so don't believe that I'm "symbolizing away" the truth.  I'm simply looking at what the words of the book say, without injecting my need for a modern-time explanation.  This is a book written for men of all times... not just those of us who know what microchips are .  Now that I understand it, it's become my favorite part of the Bible... and not because it's a horror story of the destruction of the world, but because it's a story of loving encouragement and warning from a caring Father.

I'm not a theologian, I haven't spent years studying Latin and Hebrew texts, so (as always) I hope you won't just take my word for it.  Study and seek knowledge for yourself on the matter, and I believe you'll come to the same awareness that I have, myself.  To help out, here are a couple of links for starters:

Understanding Revelation - This is a simple, one (long) page explanation that touches on all of the various points of the most common misconceptions about Revelation.  It's a fantastic overview of what I believe, so check it out.

A Study of Revelation - This one is much more thorough, and is the study I originally came across that opened my eyes.  I can't support every topic that is mentioned (I'm unsure about the constant mention of the Catholic church, specifically), and other topics on this site aren't in line with what I believe, but for detailed explanation of each verse, I haven't found anything more comprehensive.  I personally recommend watching/listening to each study, because I think the words come across much better in person.

Adriana Lima may not be my prototypical "blonde with blue eyes", but my goodness, she still looks... she... um.....

Well... nobody's perfect .

I know, I know... I disappeared, again.  I wasn't sitting here contemplating life, as my last post may have you thinking.  Okay, I wasn't JUST sitting here contemplating life. (Ed. I just erased the nearly-finished entry, from this point... I hate that and had to share)  No, I was playing a wonderful little game you may have heard of called Red Dead Redemption.  In case you have NOT heard of it, it's an open-world western in the same vein as the Grand Theft Auto series.  This ain't GTA, though.  It's a world of cowboys, open expanses, wild animals, and guns.  Okay, so it's a LITTLE like GTA, but the similarities are drowned out by the environment.  It's the western game I'd always hoped for, and because of this I like Red Dead Redemption even more than my beloved Grand Theft Auto IV.  This isn't a review (as I still have so much more to play), but it's been a week of fun and surprises, and I'd like to share that with you below .

Note on spoilers: I'm not ruining story elements here, (as I'd hate for anyone to ruin the story for ME, too), but I'm sharing a number of game-play elements that surprised me and entertained the heck out of me, and I wouldn't want to ruin those surprises for anyone hoping to experience them first-hand.

Since my last personal entry, on being unbold, I've really been facing myself on alot of issues - trying to understand things.  I've always been curious, since I was an adorable little boy, and that carries through to everything.  Whether it's about how things work, the details of someone's story, or even understanding my own self, one of my favorite words in the world is "why".  One of my least favorite words?  Compromise.

I work through things by writing, which is why my more personal entries are so scattered, so, again... this post is nothing more than that - and I'm warning you now .  I'm not writing this one to entertain (though I'm hoping to have a fun new series for June... working on that), but to try figuring myself out.  And, inviting you all in to the discussion can only help - either for me to get fresh perspectives or for you to better understand the crazy little man known as Mark Mushakian.

So, why the disdain of compromise?  I don't know... but that's what I'm trying to figure out.  It affects everything, including movie-making, but the subject in which it is most prevalent, and in which I started thinking about it again last night was relationships.  Romantic relationships.

Babies
Time/place: 12:15 showing at Aliso Viejo 20

First, the simple version.  Do you love little kids?  Does simple love make you smile?  Do you find joy in watching babies discover the world around them?  Would you like to experience all of that for over an hour?  Than see Babies!

Now, the extended version.  Hee hee hee, babies!!  Dude, BABIES!  Hahaha.

Sorry.

NOW, the extended version.  If you can't tell, I loved this movie.  Babies is a documentary which takes a look at the first year of life with 4 kids from various parts of the world.  It is absolutely beautifully shot, and although there is no narrator or translations for what anyone is saying, because of the wonderful camerawork and calm pacing, everything is easily understood.  When a kid gets in trouble, when a kid is filling her diaper (hahaha, it's hilarious), you don't need to understand what exact words are spoken... and that's a big point of the whole thing.

The aforementioned pacing keeps it interesting for those who love kids, and I don't know why you'd be seeing it, otherwise.  The focus is always on the babies and whoever may be interacting with them - parents, siblings, animals.  For me, since I adore kids, while I was cracking up and smiling throughout the entire thing (not sure if I've ever laughed more at a movie), the serene nature of it all made me feel very cozy and relaxed.  I know, though, that for many people, even though the picture is only 79 minutes long... they'd get bored out of their minds.  For me, however, it never even got close to boring .  Also, in terms of its PG rating, I will let you know that you're going to see alot of nakedness - topless moms for feeding and, in the case of Africa, culture... and, of course, naked babies running wild.

Babies is everything I hoped it'd be - and more.  It was one of the best hour and 20 minutes I've ever had, and if you have an inkling to see it, grab some gal-pals (do any other guys want to actually see this??) or take your grown kids, and enjoy the living heck out of this movie.  It may be just a documentary about babies, but it's about so much more, and when the final scene came about and the final song began to play, I smiled hard... with a tear of joy in my eye.

Grade: A+

P.S. - Now, more than ever, I want 574 babies.

P.P.S. - Bree, I will happily, happily, happily watch this with you when we get the chance... happily

P.P.P.S - I want 3,918 babies.